Please, let me fuck your mom
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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