Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
