ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize