i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize