woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
