i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
