He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
