I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
