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They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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