were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
