It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
