You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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