Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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