he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The air was thick with penises
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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