R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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