Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
this will be a night to untag.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
