last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
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