wat bout pragnant strippers??
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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