Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize