im drinking this country out of the recession.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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