haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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