I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
