nut hugger
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
