but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
