oh god the rape fog is back!
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Lo siento on account of my penis...
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
