is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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