Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
What a dumb baby whore.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
