She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
