Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
