I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
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