I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
