AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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