If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
