I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
