it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
