Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
