She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize