pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize