I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
