i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
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