im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
