to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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