Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize
