So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Can you bring me the toilet please
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
