he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
