Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
