I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
