the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
