Cold hands, warm shart.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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