Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
