JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
